Trim the Fat Talk at the Holidays

A family guide to supporting loved ones with eating disorder and other mental health concerns

Because the holidays offer more opportunity for family time, this can be when families start to notice unhealthy eating habits in their children or loved ones. When the school year is up and running, with work schedules and sports schedules it can be difficult to notice that a loved one is not eating as much as you thought they were. At the holidays, families might notice their loved one isn’t eating at every meal, eats less, or finds ways to avoid family meal time, all of which could be a cause for concern.

Some simple ways to make positive change follow.

  1. Check their social situations
    Children who struggle with higher anxiety or depression, or even an eating disorder, may also struggle with social situations and might prefer to withdraw or isolate, and spend more time in their room. Parents should monitor the amount of time that their kids are spending alone, especially when everyone else is at home, as isolation could be a warning sign that kids are not doing well. This includes more than 30 minutes a day playing video games or time spent behind a screen.  Parents do not have to join the mass just because every other child spends hours playing video games. If it does not feel right, trust your gut.
  2. Monitor food consumption
    Frequently we see families who come in to us that gave the responsibility to their child to pack their lunches in the morning, or they might not be checking up on them to see if they are actually eating lunch at school. During the school year, parents should communicate with the child’s teacher or school if there is a concern that their child may not be eating enough. Also, the body never lies. Have the pediatrician monitor your child’s weight. Too often, pediatrician’s miss eating disorders because they tend to have obesity at the forefront of their minds. When a child is trending downward on the growth chart it may take longer for providers to become concerned.
  3. Carve out time for family
    In addition to fostering family communication, family time gives parents a daily opportunity to check in with their children and see how they’re doing. This time should be spent actively engaging with eachother. Examples include playing a board game, talking, going for a walk, or doing a craft together. Avoid watching television as there is not much room for discussion when the tv is on.
  4. Cut out “fat talk”
    Parents should be mindful of the behaviors they model that could promote negative body image, such as discussion of diets and weight loss, which many obsess over at the holidays. Replace fat talk with conversation that is focused on personality and character strengths in your children and values that are important to the family. 

For more supportive tips for overcoming stress that can be part of the holiday season, make an appointment with Dr. Schwalen, PhD-founder of Next STEPS Worldwide psychological services. Call today at 469-294-9075.

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